Venom

For those not caught up to speed I’m blind now

It’s only been a few months so it’s still a recent development but I’ve spent the last few months learning a lot about myself and decided to share my new journey because one of the things I’ve realized recently is that you don’t need vision to see clearly 

Last week I had the most vivid dream

I watched myself paint a painting for hours like a fly on the wall

By the time I woke up I knew I had to get started before the image became less vivid in my mind

I don’t know why I felt so compelled to paint this I just knew that I felt the need with so much urgency I couldn’t ignore it

I assumed that like most of the things I make this would be something I would sell so I started

It was an easy and frustrating process all at the same time it eventually I finished

Right before I finished though my son topher came and started telling me how amazing I was doing 

He couldn’t believe I was painting this blind he was blown away that I could do this somehow and he asked 

are you going to sell it

Of course I said I’m going to try

How much are you going to sell it for he said out of curiosity

I have no idea honestly I don’t even know if it’s good enough to sell or if anyone would see value in it but maybe $150 and hopefully someone will think it’s worth that much

Mommy don’t sell it I’ll save my money and I’ll buy it from you

Honey you don’t have to buy anything from me I love you

I finished and later that night sitting alone with my thoughts in the dark it hit me like the rear view mirror I walked into that day

I can’t sell it

I now know why I painted this 

It doesn’t matter what it looks like or if it’s good at all 

I honestly don’t even care 

I thought I would but now that it’s finished I realize that it being worth something to some stranger wasn’t the point

It’s the idea that no matter what obstacles lay before you if you work hard enough and focus it is possible to accomplish anything you set your mind to

That no matter what happens in life if you keep moving that anything is possible even the things that may sound unachievable

During this phase of my life whether it’s temporary or not I will get to choose what direction I go in even if I can’t see the path anymore and every day I’m going to show my children through example that life is full of setbacks but no matter what life hits you with you just have to keep getting back up and come back harder and better than you were before

This painting is priceless and I can’t think of a better place for it to hang than in my sons room